Fix "unhashable type: 'list'" exception in federation handling

get_state_groups returns a map from state_group_id to a list of FrozenEvents,
so was very much the wrong thing to be putting as one of the entries in the
list passed to resolve_events_with_factory (which expects maps from
(event_type, state_key) to event id).

We actually want get_state_groups_ids().values() rather than
get_state_groups().

This fixes the main problem in #3923, but there are other problems with this
bit of code which get discovered once you do so.