We passed in a graph to `sorted_topologically` which didn't have an
entry for each node (as we dropped nodes with no edges).

We don't always need the full power of a DeferredCache.

We need to make sure we are readu for the `set_cache_factor` callback.

* Add `DeferredCache.get_immediate` method

A bunch of things that are currently calling `DeferredCache.get` are only
really interested in the result if it's completed. We can optimise and simplify
this case.

* Remove unused 'default' parameter to DeferredCache.get()

* another get_immediate instance

rather than have everything that instantiates an LruCache manage metrics
separately, have LruCache do it itself.

Closes: https://github.com/matrix-org/synapse/issues/6766

Equivalent Sydent PR: https://github.com/matrix-org/sydent/pull/309

I believe it's now time to remove the extra allowed `:` from `client_secret` parameters.

fixes #7016

First some background: StreamChangeCache is used to keep track of what "entities" have 
changed since a given stream ID. So for example, we might use it to keep track of when the last
to-device message for a given user was received [1], and hence whether we need to pull any to-device messages from the database on a sync [2].

Now, it turns out that StreamChangeCache didn't support more than one thing being changed at
a given stream_id (this was part of the problem with #7206). However, it's entirely valid to send
to-device messages to more than one user at a time.

As it turns out, this did in fact work, because *some* methods of StreamChangeCache coped
ok with having multiple things changing on the same stream ID, and it seems we never actually
use the methods which don't work on the stream change caches where we allow multiple
changes at the same stream ID. But that feels horribly fragile, hence: let's update
StreamChangeCache to properly support this, and add some typing and some more tests while
we're at it.

[1]: https://github.com/matrix-org/synapse/blob/release-v1.12.3/synapse/storage/data_stores/main/deviceinbox.py#L301
[2]: https://github.com/matrix-org/synapse/blob/release-v1.12.3/synapse/storage/data_stores/main/deviceinbox.py#L47-L51

* Pull Sentinel out of LoggingContext

... and drop a few unnecessary references to it

* Factor out LoggingContext.current_context

move `current_context` and `set_context` out to top-level functions.

Mostly this means that I can more easily trace what's actually referring to
LoggingContext, but I think it's generally neater.

* move copy-to-parent into `stop`

this really just makes `start` and `stop` more symetric. It also means that it
behaves correctly if you manually `set_log_context` rather than using the
context manager.

* Replace `LoggingContext.alive` with `finished`

Turn `alive` into `finished` and make it a bit better defined.

Ensure good comprehension hygiene using flake8-comprehensions.

... since the whole response is huge.

We even need to break up the assertions, since kibana otherwise truncates them.

This makes it easier to use in an async/await world.

Also fixes a bug where cache descriptors would occaisonally return a raw
value rather than a deferred.

Track the time that a server started failing at, for general analysis purposes.

This gives a bit of a grace period where we can attempt to refetch a
remote `well-known`, while still using the cached result if that fails.

Hopefully this will make the well-known resolution a bit more torelant
of failures, rather than it immediately treating failures as "no result"
and caching that for an hour.

There was some inconsistent behaviour in the caching layer around how
exceptions were handled - particularly synchronously-thrown ones.

This seems to be most easily handled by pushing the creation of
ObservableDeferreds down from CacheDescriptor to the Cache.

- Put the default window_size back to 1000ms (broken by #5181)
- Make the `rc_federation` config actually do something
- fix an off-by-one error in the 'concurrent' limit
- Avoid creating an unused `_PerHostRatelimiter` object for every single
  incoming request